There I Am, Crying In A Department Store Dressing Room
Posted by Melissa Carter at 8/24/2008 3:51 PM 
Categories: uncategorized
Tags: gay lesbian Bert Show Q100 Melissa Bert Show dressing room spanx
Categories: uncategorized
Tags: gay lesbian Bert Show Q100 Melissa Bert Show dressing room spanx
Yep. I hate clothes shopping, and have on more than one occasion cried from the experience.
Why?
A department store dressing room is the one place that can make every woman feel far less attractive than she had originally seen herself in her mind. Dressing room mirrors are the event horizon of a black hole of ego, where even the most seemingly confident woman can go in and come out a shell of herself.
I am not one you would consider to be overweight, even though I could stand to jump on the exercise equipment I have stored in a guest room. My issue is the way my body was made. Much like a 2 X 4, if it swallowed a canteloupe. What I mean is I have no chest or hips, so when I do gain weight it is all in my lower abs. All of it. And when they make clingy cotton shirts and low-rise jeans as the standard for young women, my body becomes the Before picture personal trainers use to seduce clients. You can't get much more focused on my problem area than to wear the fashions of today.
And bless Sara Blakely and her Spanx, but sometimes her miracle cure tends to spread my love of chocolate to other areas, rather than making my bulge disappear.
Maybe they can create a circus mirror that would make every woman look like the models on those banners that are conveniently hung in the store, so that way everyone walks out with a smile on their face. They'd certainly see an increase in sales instead of seeing piles of clothes like mine on dressing room benches.
I completely agree with you. But I also think it has a lot to do with the image put out there all of our lives of what a woman is 'supposed' to look like. I'm 5'2, 100 lbs and I'm not happy with how I look. Everything has gone absurd. God didn't take a cookie cutter and cut us all out of some cookie dough..we're individuals made to look different..be different and that's ok. We shine through our differences and we need to support another in our differences..not pick ourselves apart for what isn't 'perfect' in the eyes of some in society. That's why I liked those Dove commercials until I found out the same people who made Axe made them. YOU are beautiful missy...and trust me..no one likes mirrors..but is it the mirror that is the problem or our way of thinking?
P.S. I don't like shoppin either. My measurements are 34-31-33....I'm either a square..or..close to it. When people make a small (which is what my chest and hips fit)..they make it for a size 25 waist...which I don't fit..clothes were not made to fit the average person which is why everyone thinks they're a large.
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I'm 5'4" and weigh 260lbs. So I'm plus sized AND Petite! I have broad shoulders and muscular forearms..Finding clothes can be a real challenge some times and I used to feel the same way as you.
I like actually shopping for clothes, but trying them on was terror. Even though I haven't lost any weight (recently) I no longer feel this way anymore.
You know why? TLC's "What Not To Wear"
While I do have some problems with their insistent gendering..They are always so body positive. Stacey ALWAYS SAYS it is not your body. Your body is not wrong. Your body is not strangely shaped. It is the clothes that are wrong. It is the clothes that don't fit. YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM! Clothes can be tailored.
And after hearing that so many times, it was like a cloud lifted. My body isn't wrong, the clothes are. The designers are. Who are they thinking of when they make these clothes?
It's important you dress the biggest part of you and then tailor the rest down. If you feel your current size isn't making you look right, go UP a size. It'll make you look better.
I have learned SO VERY MUCH from "What Not to Wear". I wish I'd had it back in highschool. I know how to dress myself now. I know what shapes and cuts will look good on me and how to play with color. I can look good and dress well, my size IS NOT A FACTOR!
Because should (and they WILL) work for ME. Not the other way around!
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I suffer greatly from poor body image - I hear in my head Dr. Phil stating - it is your body - no you. I am Plus size and gain my weight everywhere. I also hear What Not To Wear saying if you don't like the size but it fits well - cut the tag out. I think Lane Bryant has done more for women and plus sizes - they design their clothes for different body shapes and help overweight woman feel stylish and look good regardless of their weight. I get compliments on my clothes all the time because I have learned to buy not what I like but also what looks good on me.
Know this is a woman's curse and from some one who has been through all eating disorders to be what I thought would make people accept me - you are who you are. God doesn't make garbage but clothing designers do!
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I think it's great that you showed your vulnerability and wrote about your thoughts on your own body image. I think that when it comes down to it, people need to be happy in their own skin. I took a huge plunge this year and got a Lap Band - which is an alternative to gastric bypass. I realized that I didn't want to be overweight anymore and always struggled getting my weight off despite whatever diet I did. I am proud to say that since January I'm down 65 pounds! It's the first time, EVER, I've seen the success!
All of this to say, it was important for me to do something about my weight. Now when I see my flabby tummy, it's a sign of my success! Will I need a tummy tuck...hmmmm...I'm not sure yet.
I still don't love department store shopping because I'm in between the Women's sizes and regular sizes. But as women, I think the best thing we can do is support one another on our journey's, which starts with someone opening up about their thoughts - so I thank you for that.
You can check out my weight loss blog at www.LiveLifeToTheFullestBlog.com
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