Who The Hell Are YOU?
Posted by Melissa Carter at 4/27/2009 10:01 AM 
Categories: uncategorized
Tags: birdhouse gay Melissa Bert Show Bert Show Q100 bird birds University of Tennessee lesbian
Categories: uncategorized
Tags: birdhouse gay Melissa Bert Show Bert Show Q100 bird birds University of Tennessee lesbian
I've never been one for birdhouses. Not that they aren't cozy lawn ornaments, but the only one I've even touched was one that depicted the University of Tennessee as a redneck place. Thanks, Joe, for that gift.
Katie and I recently moved to a neighborhood that offered a free hand-made birdhouse to new residents. Loving that very Pleasantville/Mayberry feel, we had this birdhouse planted in the backyard. Cozy lawn ornament.
Something happened last week that made me notice the birdhouse. Katie was throwing a Frisbee with our dog when all of the sudden....I zoned in on the birdhouse. Walking toward it I motioned Katie to follow me. I just wanted to see. Could it be more than decoration?
I slowly lifted the small wooden door beneath the tiny hole and initially saw straw inside! That somehow inspired me to continue even slower until I had lifted the door completely.
You know how your eyes have to adjust when you first walk into a dark theater? For whatever reason my eyes were trying to adjust to the bird's nest that appeared before me.
*This is where life begins moving in slow motion*
A bird lifted it's head and stared at me, as if to say "Who The HELL Are YOU?"
My eyes opened wide as if I'd accidentally seen her naked.
*Now life begins moving at a normal pace*
I then jerked the door shut as I ducked my head, as if the bird had a gun.
Of course Katie was not satisfied by this, and boldly opened the door again to see what was inside. Not hearing my warning to stop in time, I saw a blur of Katie losing her balance and blue feathers. At the end of this very cartoonish exchange of dust, wings, and arms flailing.....the bird was gone.
STILL not satisfied that she didn't see everything there was to see, Katie lifted the door AGAIN and ducked her head in while I was half-way to our back door. That's when she informed me there were a nest of baby birds in there.
Now I'm not sure whether my Dad simply used this tactic to keep me out of trees and nests or if it is real, but I learned that you are not supposed to touch bird eggs or the Momma Bird will abandon them after smelling the foreign scent of human. Was it the same for hatched birds? I tried to get us all in the house since I now felt bad that we disturbed that feathery family.
"But they're babies in here," Katie said with enthusiasm.
I'm sure she imagined me in fatigues as I ordered her inside, explaining those babies could die if she didn't. Reluctantly she came inside, and I stared out of the back window to see if the Mom would return.
Looking...
Looking...
Uh oh. What have we done?
How are we going to take care of baby birds?
Katie got on the computer to learn how and to see if my theory of human scent was accurate.
And then, finally, a flicker of movement from a small branch. Then I see her jump to another. She landed on the birdhouse and stuck her head inside to see if those strange giants did anything to her children. And then she popped inside.
All is well.
Now I want to put up another birdhouse in the yard.
I love this blog! haha. What a fun entry and I love that you love bird houses now. I didn't care for them either..but now I just love birds and their cheery songs. Wow that sounds really lame but..really it's a wonderful thing to enjoy. I'm glad you have a bird family in your backyard. Hopefully there isn't a cat family near by.
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they are fun to watch....put out some feeders and a birdbath too!!!
By the way, you write beautifully...
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Hey Melissa. I love bluebirds!! This is prime season for them and their babies. Be sure to clean out the birdhouse in a few more weeks--after the babies have left and the parents, too. (Typically by early June, they've left) If you do this, they will return over and over. They always like to build a new nest + it's super cool to find the old one--and you may even find an egg or two that didn't hatch.
BTW, love your show--Jeff is hilarious. ~LTP
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I love birds, me and my partner just bought a house right out side Decatur last year, unfortunately some one took an axe to the trees before we even got to see the house. so no birds for us, until our newly planted trees grow
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I Love your story, The same scenario has happened to me this spring. I'd had a cheapo bird house that I'd bought several years ago and this year we had a Couple of chickadee's make a family in that little house that sits on our front porch.
I leave them food and water, because new Mom's are hungry/busy little creatures.
That small little house has made this Mom(me) very happy to have kept these babies out of the harm of recent storms and provided a home for a new generation.
Smiles, a bird Lover from Powder Springs
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OMG!!! I never thought that I could say "Aw, how cutie?" and laugh hysterically at the same time!!!
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